My first 5K run

Last Monday I did my very first 5k run. It went pretty well, I enjoyed it a lot. Actually it was one of my goals before turning 30 (will write them up later) to run more, even thinking about doing a half marathon next year.. but erm.. let’s see hehe

My friend and I had planned of doing this 5k run together last month (well it was all my idea, I just texted her last minute to tag along, and as supportive as she always is, she said yes of course) but she got sick the same day, so I had to run by myself, but it went pretty well, I was actually surprised and at the same time proud of myself. I didn’t even find it hard at all, I kept my pace/tempo all the way. Well, to be honest I did train hard a couple of weeks before, I did a lot of cardio in both the gym and outside, sometimes I did both strength and cardio after another to train my endurance. Guess it paid off!

Vårruset – it’s a sort of (new) annual all female running program held in some cities in Sweden. You could do from 2,5k, 5k to 10k. You can choose to run with time or for fun. And since it was supposed to be our first run (my friend and I), we just signed up for 5k- fun. T’was a great day! Would definitely do it again next year.

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Nostalgic

Hello,

Currently having a serious sep-anx after finishing the book I was reading today and I just had this biggest urge to pass by and just write something here in my little page, hmm well might as well do right! Since the last time I wrote something here was probably ages ago anyway.

Honestly though I’m just simply feeling very nostalgic today is all. Probably because this attachment feeling I am having from this book is something that I haven’t felt in a long while.

While having our after dinner walk in the park with my lil fam today, I kind of just felt very nostalgic, first as stated earlier I was thinking a lot about the book and also we were walking at the park near my old school where as a former student pretty much spent most of our (school) outdoor activities here, also as a teenager. And it just made me miss my younger self. (I’m turning 30 next year!!!! Like what?!)

Anywaaays, I just miss the things I used to like and enjoy when I was younger, things that I kind of had lost interest with along the way because life- when you get older, it becomes complicated, and adulthood is a confusing stage in life with no precautions, no right directions nor instructions on how to puzzle it all together. The loud sound and echoing pressure from different areas of the society will deafen your senses and blurry your sights ahead, but each puzzle piece will eventually fit each other, so don’t worry, you’re doing great, champ! (looking back to my old written posts here about my journey to adulthood, which I wrote during my teenage years giving me mixed reactions atm hahaha.. )

I just longingly remember the days where I enjoyed writing, writing my thoughts and poems. I also miss reading a lot, though I made a promise that I’ll be rekindling with my first love (reading obviously) and set a goal to read at least 50 books this year… Haha okay probably too ambitious there, but I’ll see how many I’ll finish by year ends. (started reading again last month).

Anywhooo when we got home, my partner and I just turned on Spotify and just started listening to old songs (feat. my daughter’s tantrums in the background somewhere here and there of course)

Traveler’s Diary #9 (Iceland)

This post was supposed to be posted 5 years ago haha, but anyway here it is.

So this Iceland trip was my surprise gift for my boyfriend. We’ve been very excited to go to this trip for days. It’s also our first out of the country trip together, which makes it more exciting.

After we’ve known that we are going to Iceland, we’ve done nothing but planned and researched about how things were in Iceland and what were the do’s and dont’s  when we get there.

Upon arrival we were surprised by the stillness of the place when we landed there. It was quietly calm and peaceful (compare to Gothenburg), but I think that’s how things are when you travel up North. I have been to the northern part of Sweden a lot of times and there’s always this calmness feeling  that you don’t get from the chaotic Southern part of the country. It’s relaxing.

Anyway, we didn’t stay much at the capital (Reykjavik), but rather drove around to their famous nature sights which were all located outside the city, and also knowing how my boyfriend is, we also did some stops (in almost) every village we passed by (yep, he is that spontaneous). We also have seen some infamous places in Iceland where tourists don’t bother looking and even did a lot of hiking to the wilderness chasing infamous waterfalls, but mostly hiking, lots of it.

Overall the trip was adventurously fun, from unexpected bath in a hot spring out of nowhere, to spending overnight in the car somewhere, to stress calling a colleague to cover your shift because you missed your flight home, to getting used to having all four seasons in the same day, to me driving without license because bf was tired, to discovering hidden gem places, to chasing waterfalls, to seafood buffet and just to everything! Would definitely definitely come back soon.

Reminder:

* If you are planning to rent a car, be sure to have your credit cards ready. Well, you could also pay with your debit cards of course but that would mean that you’d have to pay the whole insurance thing that they want you to do.

* Eat lamm! I never liked lamm here in Sweden but when I tasted their lamm soup I was amazed, and have been looking for it since.

* Everything is as expensive as things are in Sweden, especially going to the Blue Lagoon, but it’s worth it.

* Mostly all the beautiful sights in Iceland are located in the wilderness and takes a lot of walking to get there so make sure you bring a good pair of shoes and training clothes. And WATER! you’ll be sweating a lot.

* Renting a car is good, but they also have a lot of tour busses so it’s not a problem.

* Iceland is beautiful and peaceful, and has the most scenic view of all time.

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Meatballs with Water Spinach

I’ve been craving for Swedish meat balls with mashed potatoes since yesterday so I decided last night that I would do some today for our lunch, but then I saw that I didn’t have any potatoes left, but I had some left over water spinach in the fridge that’s starting to degrade, so I decided to make some Swedish meatballs anyway but with an Asian twist.

Ingredients:

Homemade meatballs Meatballs recipe (swedish)

Water spinach

Garlic (minced)

2 red chili peppers (chopped)

Canola oil

1 tbsp soy sauce

1 tbsp oyster sauce

water

Methods:

Heat the pan, then add in the oil. Wait until the oil is hot. (I used the same pan and oil from the meat balls)

Add in the minced garlic and the red chili peppers. Stir for 1 minute just to get that tasty appetizing smell from them.

Add in the water spinach, stir for 10 seconds.

Add the sauces and water (how much water is preferable, up to you how saucy you want it). Stir for 10 sec.

Add in the homemade meatballs. Stir for 30 sec. Put in the hit for 1 minute without mixing. Do not overcook the water spinach.

Take out from the heat. Then take a taste, add salt or peppar if you want more flavor, or if it’s too salty for you, add more water.

(NOTE! When I make my meatballs, I usually just half fried them and finish them up in the oven so they become more juicier and not so dry. Anyway a bit of juice will come out from the meatballs after you take them out from the oven, instead of throwing it away you can mix it with the sauce for extra flavor)

Serve with Paulúns Supermix (mixture of  brown rice, quinoa, black-eyed beans mm. ) Assemble everything in a bowl together with some cooked vegetables, whatever you find in your freezer (I had some frozen haricots herbs and broccoli). Sprinkles with sesame seed and a little roasted garlic. Yum!

Finding Out I Was Pregnant

Was this planned? No.

Did you consider to not continue the pregnancy? Honestly, I had millisecond thought about it but I decided to keep it at the end. And it was the best decision I have ever made in my life.

Anyway before my pregnancy I was studying in UNI and working, that was my daily life and of course going on some gateway trips every now and then. It was a fun life but also quite stressing at times.  I was actually very stressed out, first because our house, my school, my work and my bf’s place were all in different cities (like 30min-1hr apart), and having a car doesn’t make it easier either. Second I was stressing a lot about keeping up with my studies because I was working too much- well I work to survive and pay my bills and gas to school, yes I could have gotten student loan, but I chose not to. Anyway just a couple of weeks before I found out I was pregnant, I actually got another job just a couple of minutes away from my school. I was very excited because it’s big well-known company and also I already started my trainings and tests there etc., but all of them I set aside as soon as I made up my mind to keep it.

2nd week of March my boyfriend and I went on a trip to Mallorca and when we came back a week after I was supposed to get my period then, but I didn’t. It didn’t really cross my mind that I was pregnant or anything because it could have been delayed because of my stress or something. And so April came, and I started to notice my breast getting a bit heavier and bigger, and they bounces more than usual when I’m in the gym. I showed them to my friends to see if they noticed and they thought that it could be that my period is on the way, so okay I was a little relief after that. And then I started to feel tired all the time. At work I would keep yawning and feeling drowsy, and when I get home at night I would just fall asleep after dinner in the couch.

3rd week of April when I was supposed to get my period and still didn’t, I started to feel anxious and I started looking up online about my symptoms and I would end up getting a result of me being pregnant all the time. So I told my dear co-worker about my anxiousness and that I didn’t want to buy any pregnancy-tests so she gave me one that she had at home. I peeped on it when I woke up the next morning (they recommend that your first pee in the morning would give you more accurate result when taking the test) and the the two red lines appeared! My first reaction was shocked, and I panicked and I immediately threw the test away in the thrash can and hoping it’s expired. And in that moment I started to think through how and what am I going to do and what are my options and everything.

The next hour I texted my bf with the picture of the test, his reply was “Is that true?” “What are we going to do?” “Is that for real?” bla bla. I told him it could be that the test kit was expired and so I asked him to buy me a new one and he gladly did, he bought the much expensive one (clear blue) just to be very sure, and so I peeped on it and it came out as positive as well. And so we had a talk about it, he was very excited and would gladly keep it, but of course he said it’s still my choice, and I already made my choice that day, I knew I would keep it but I was still in shocked of course. And seeing him that day being excited and all, made me feel a little better and less anxious of the situation. I actually felt relief, his reaction gave me relief.

I also realized then that with all the stress that’s been going on in my life that time, I actually needed something, some changes because my mind wasn’t at peace, I was always running around, chasing something, feeling exhausted, I was literally swimming in an ocean of stress everyday without any clear directions which way I’m supposedly go, and the pregnancy was like the unexpected shore that showed up in my sight to tell me to take breath, rest up and navigate your life better.

Pregnancy also pushed my partner and I to become more mature. Today my little family and I live in our own little place and figuring out life together. My decisions and actions today are now all based on how this and that would  affect my daughter. Everything is all about her now. Being a mom just makes you so selfless.

Updates updates!!

Okay, last time I posted something here I wasn’t a mother nor actually planning be one yet. But life is full of surprises and suddenly I became one. Yes lads, I am a m-o-m now of the cutest little baby in the world! I will probably post a lot about her (yes, it’s a daughter) here and I’m also going to write about how my pregnancy was. How it has changed me physically and mentally, how I dealt with it and how being a first time mom is. And of course some tips!

Also I am currently a full-time mom for the time being, I was going back to work last month but because of the pandemic issue we are facing today, I decided not to yet for my family’s safety. So because I’m just at home most of the time right now, I actually have “developed/awakened” some abilities of mine- like cooking and baking (or experimenting as my partner would call it), I also learned more about recycling (some DIYs that I am willing to share) and taking care of both my baby and my plants and many more — that I will be posting here as well!

xx

#Throwback III

2011: My red hair year.

— The sunglasses made me look like a blind person haha (please don’t mind the thin eyebrows.. It WAS actually a trend back in the days!)

Traveler’s Diary #8 (Hawaii)

So this year my travel buddy and I got blown by the wanderlust wind to the Oceania. Yep! We indured the 27hours of traveling just to reach the paradise that is also known as Hawaii, the Aloha State.

First thing we did that midnight when we landed in Honolulu was look for a taxi who could take us to the hotel, but we kinda got a tip from the staffs at the Airport that it would be economically better if we take the Uber instead.

Uber is apparently like taxis, except drivers use their personal cars. You book an Uber through an Uber app, and in the app, you could see the overall price of your trip all the way (it’s cheaper than taxis, I tell ya!). They also featured the profile and reviews of each driver in the app. You pay them through it as well (prepare your cards, lads, no cash!) Our first ever Uber driver was Ty. He was a friendly and very social dude. He clearly explained to us how things were in O’ahu (the island we’re at). He was just simply awesome!

We stayed in a condominium-like kind of place in Honolulu called Marina Tower on our first day, it was close to the city center and just probably 10minutes walk to Ala Moana Mall and to the Ala Moana Beach Park. (These two places had been our second home. The food court at the Mall was like our kitchen and the Beach Park was our house, haha)

After a couple of days in Honolulu, we moved to our second destination which was Waikiki. We were definitely surprised by the amounts of tourists in Waikiki. It was packed, they were everywhere. It was so different from Honolulu, erm it was much MORE livelier.

Anyway, we stayed at a hostel in Waikiki called the Beach Boutique Hostel. We took a private room with a shared bathroom. It was a good place, specially for backpackers or for the people who don’t expect fancy living. They also offer free breakfast, free tours and free beach kits (be sure to book their free tours early to insure your seats in the van, because every tour has only room for 10people) The staffs were great and friendly. My friend and I tried one of their free tours to Kaiwi Shoreline Trail and to the Sandy Beach. We were led by a spontaneous driver/tour guide who by the way forgets about his group from time to time… but he was amazing, we were actually surprised about our little unexpected trip detours on the way. It was crazy, would definitely do it again!!! (P.S don’t be surprised by why the staffs are too laid back.. You’ll know when you get there)

Anywho we actually planned a lot of activities for us to do for the whole stay, but unfortunately we had to cut off some of them because of my sunburn… Yep sunburn.. it was (sorta) critical because I had blisters, I was itching like crazy and my body was frustratedly hot (could barely move) It was torture. But since I couldn’t get out while the sun was at its strongest, my Travel Buddy enjoyed her solitary adventure around town, like biking, surfing, sun bathing etc. And I was stuck in my room watching The Office (well not much to do about it now is there?) So we started a drill her and I, we both get our solitary moment during the day until 14:00/15:00, and when the sun starts to weaken down that’s when I get out and join her outside to continue our plans, like mountain climbing or going somewhere outside Waikiki. And it worked out for us, though honestly I did bore myself out in the room from time to time.

Overall we sure did enjoy our stay in O’ahu. The sceneries in the island were extraordinary, the food were great (tasted LaoLao and Loco Moco, but our ultimate favorite was the Açaí bowls♥️) the people were friendly and helpful, the weather was amazing (except that one night when it was all lighting and thunder and everything was  floating at the kitchen in the hostel), but still we loved it there so mahalo Hawaii!!!

Friendly reminders:

* Wear sunscreen!!! Even if the sun in Hawaii doesn’t seem strong don’t risk it, or you’d end up like me.

* There is so called “mandatory/complimentary fee that every accommodation asks when you check in so don’t be surprised.

* Try their Açaí bowls!! The best one I had and would recommed is the one at the The Island Vintage Café, located inside the Ala Moana Center near the food court.

* It’s very easy to go places with their busses and bikes.

* Try the Spam sushi at the ABC stores!

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(DIY) Kvarg smoothie

So I was just at home, in the kitchen mixing stuff up together and came up with a good (healthy) smoothie recipe that you should definitely try!

The recipe is in Swedish because it’s easier for me to write that way, but I’ll try to translate it in English.

• 1 dl  kvarg (not sure what this is in English, it says quark here but not sure… anyway just Google it)

• 1/3 melon (melon)

• en hel passionsfrukt (one whole passionfruit)

• en hel banan (one whole banana)

• 1 msk havregryn (1 tbs oatmeal)

• 2 1/2 msk havremjölk (2 1/2 tbs oat milk)

Just throw everything in in the blender and voilà! There you have it, a healthy delicious smoothie. Enjoy!

Restart

Don’t you just sometimes wish that you have a restart button in your purse and just push it and do over everything again? I do.

I would really wish for that right now.  I want to restart year 2017 and do everything better so then I would not be in my situation right now.

My year 2018 started off a little bit stress-y and now everything has become a mess, a total disaster. And today I am feeling the after effects. I’m sad. I’m lonely. I’m feeling tired, lazy rather. I’m starting to question my life situation, like where have I ever gone wrong? Why am I the only one? Why do I feel like a disappointment? Why can’t I get it? Why can’t I have it? I mean deep inside I know I could, but why coudn’t I? Are my efforts not enough? Or i’m just really the unluckiest person in the world?

You know that feeling when you thought you’re moving one step forward but actually you’re moving two steps backwards? And people are just waiting and staring at you there making fool of yourself. That’s me right there, the fool. I’m ashamed of myself. I’m a failure. I’m stressed out of my life. I’m losing focus. I have so much in my plate right now that I’m starting to feel numb inside, like mentally. It’s like I don’t feel or don’t want to feel anything around me anymore. I don’t know. I’m just mentally tired of everything. I just want to runaway, far away from everybody and everything.

*sigh* what the hell is this what they call a midlife crisis or what? But i’m still 24 (soon) though!! 😦

To the man up there, why? I know you won’t answer me, and that I have to rely on myself on this one, so I decided that I’m going to try— I will try to fix myself. Right now at this moment as I am writing this I actually feel a little better (well writing has always been my own psychiatrist, it always makes me feel free) but yeah, I will try to fix me…. I will.